the man who outgrew me | musing no. 48

learning to measure success by who outgrows you, not who stays.

he told me today he’s leaving.

six years of working side by side.

six years of watching him evolve from raw potential into a calm, steady, brilliant leader.

and he’s leaving for a publicly traded company.

twelve years ago, i would’ve fought it.

i would’ve made him an offer he couldn’t refuse, tried to convince him that loyalty meant staying put.

but growth demands loss.

and this time, i let him go.

when he started, he didn’t know a thing about the industry.

he was sarcastic, defensive, sharp—but unsure of how to lead.

i remember telling him once,

your sarcasm is distracting people from how brilliant you are.

you think it’s wit.

but what they hear is distance.

and distance kills trust.

he listened.

he changed.

and over time, he became the man i always knew he could be.

so when he came to me about the new opportunity,

i looked him in the eye and said,

you earned it.

and i meant it.

he told me he’d never forget what i taught him—

that without this company, he wouldn’t have this chance.

and i told him,

i’m proud of you.

not just for what you’ve done,

but for who you’ve become.

we shook hands,

and it hit me—

the goal was never to keep him.

the goal was to prepare him.

letting him go didn’t make me weaker.

it reminded me how far i’ve come.

because once upon a time,

my ego would’ve mistaken control for leadership.

but real leaders don’t grip tighter.

they build people strong enough to walk away.

— author

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