dating while building cuffed | musing no. 51

what happens when she can read every layer of you long before you’ve learned anything real about her.

most people worry about when to tell someone they’re dating a small detail about their life. a hobby. a scar. a preference. something manageable.

i don’t have that luxury.

i built a project that lets people walk straight into my head. they don’t need to know me to know me. they just need a link.

and that’s the part i never anticipated.

now that i’m dating again, i’ve had to confront something i didn’t have language for until recently: cuffed creates an information asymmetry so big it can distort the entire relationship before it even begins. she can read my patterns, my history, my mistakes, my evolution, my grief, my desires. she gets depth before i get context.

that imbalance is uncomfortable in a way most people will never experience.